It’s not about you.

A friend once asked me if I was aware of my blindspots. Blindspots, she said, are those inherent qualities that are so ingrained into our being, that we cannot recognise them in ourselves. Like the thing you recognise about someone, which you would feel uncomfortable telling them about because it feels too close to who they are, feels unchangeable. It’s hard to know ourselves. And running the risk of exposing these blindspots to others is an uncomfortable thought to me, which I think is why I’ve always disliked public speaking.

Last December, I was invited to teach a master class about sound design at the Macau International Short Film Festival. Leading up to the festival, I felt nervous and insecure. What ground-breaking fact or idea about sound design could I possibly reveal to a room full of filmmakers? That question filled me with doubt, so I took a new approach. I started writing down what I love about sound design : how it transforms the environment, how it can define your character’s state of mind, how it extends the world beyond the frame. Suddenly, I started getting a lot ideas that excited me, things I looked forward to sharing. I didn’t pretend to know more than my audience. I didn’t pretend to teach them something they didn’t already know. I didn’t make it about me.

Suddenly, with the focus on sound design instead of on myself, the pressure was off. I was to be a vessel through which to access the exciting world of sound design. Nothing less, nothing more. The audience suddenly felt less intimidating, as I realised we are all passionate about filmmaking, all on the same side. I had overcome my fear of public speaking. In the end, I actually enjoyed it. A simple transformation in perspective, but extremely effective. Leave yourself out of it.